Recap: One week ago today Mom was admitted to the hospital at Moffitt in Tampa. She had fluid building around her lungs so they needed to drain the fluid. The doctors thought she had fluid from an infection, or perhaps her heart failure, so their initial impression was to stabilize her and send her to a rehab facility. By Friday all of this changed. The fluid turned out to be melanoma, and the chest x-ray confirmed tumors in the lining of her left lung and surrounding her chest. While the BRAF medicine helped shrink the mass on her head and neck, the cancer continued to spread throughout the rest of her body. Her oncologist called me Friday night (after I posted my last blog) to say, “you should come.” He told me she probably has only a few weeks left, or three months at the most. She was moving to in-patient Hospice upon discharge.
God Sighting #1 – I call this a God-thing because it is amazing to me how God nudges people to do something, and when they follow His lead there is a known reason for it. On Friday Pastor Ron and his wife decided they needed to go visit Connie. Remember this is a two-hour drive from their home in Eustis; they were going to drive four hours in one day to visit their friend/assistant pastor. Yet, they felt the nudge to do so and proceeded to drive to Tampa. After his phone call to me, Dr. Gibney was going to her room to give her the news. It just so happened that he shared the news while the Pastor was there in the room. Coincidence? Never. This was a divine appointment.
They could have come any day of the week, but they chose Friday. They could have come earlier in the day, but they chose Friday afternoon. Who drives to Tampa on a Friday afternoon? God-fearing folks who know the Lord is leading them to do just that. I was so glad she had someone there, since I couldn’t be there to share the burden. God knew she needed someone, to comfort her when Dr. Gibney said she would never be going home. For me it was a source of comfort as well, knowing Ron and Barbara were there. He told her he could no longer treat her, and she didn’t have long to live. The cancer had progressed and it would eventually take her life. He was transferring her to Hospice once they complete the draining process, and she would never go home.
If God nudges you to do something, do it! You may never know what a blessing you can be, or how the timing could be just perfect, or how you might avoid a catastrophe by following His lead.
After hearing Dr. Gibney’s message (and wiping away the tears), I knew I had to get to Florida. The question was how? Fly? Drive? We opted to drive so Elizabeth could go with us and see her Grandma. This would also provide me with my own car while I’m here, as they would go back home in a rental. Now I have the flexibility to stay or leave whenever the timing seems right.
On the Road. So we jumped in our Santa Fe early Saturday morning and drove to Gainesville, where we got a very nice upgrade to the Presidential Suite for the same price as a double room. Perhaps this is God-sighting #2. He knew we needed a pick-me up, and He provided a beautiful room for us to rest our bodies. Or perhaps it was just a fluke? Naah. I’ve never slept in a Presidency Suite, and neither has Elizabeth, so this was quite a treat for us both.
Sunday morning we finished the trip and spent all day with Mom. She looked good, and could carry on conversation the entire time. She and Tim talked about church life. She talked about her house and belongings. I wrote out my theme verse on two sheets of copy paper and taped it to the wall. This provides her with comfort whenever she reads it (II Corinthians 4:16-18). Elizabeth asked her lots of questions and let Grandma face chat with her boyfriend. Mom told Patrick he was a hunk, and she was proud to see Elizabeth with a good Christian boyfriend. She reminded him and Elizabeth to stay true to Christ.
It was a good visit.
Mom assured us that she is ready to go to Heaven. She knows her home is not of this earth. She said with tears in her eyes that she is “anxious” to see what lies ahead. She was only afraid of choking to death, and the doctors have promised her they would not let that happen. All of us are dying, some sooner than others. So we should all prepare for our eventual death. However, death to the believer is not the “end.” It is the beginning of our eternal life with Christ. He is her “best friend” as she reminded us more than once. She is at peace, and seems to have already accepted her ultimate fate. She looks good (apparently much better than when she entered the hospital). She still has some work to do for the Lord.
God-sighting #3. In the afternoon our good friends Rob and Dawn also came to visit. It is a two-hour drive for them also (or a little less when one is driving a convertible mini Cooper I am told, with a finger to the mouth and a “shushing” sound). The timing was perfect because Tim and Elizabeth needed a ride to the airport to pick up the rental car. They said their good-byes and started the long journey back home. Dawn and I shared stories with Mom while Rob took my family to acquire their car. Once again we witnessed God’s hand of perfect timing in action. Tim got the rental for just $35, so it didn’t make sense to fly. Really! And they got an upgrade to a Mustang convertible. Once again, God-sighting #4. The last I heard, they were listening to Disney songs with the top down. This is probably also a God-sighting, as Tim has never been fond of show-tunes!
I know God is not a God of statistics. While 3-months is at the top of the bell curve, Mom could be the outlier that lasts more than anyone else in her shoes. She can miraculously recover and the melanoma can be completely eradicated from her body. God could choose to do this. They could write about her in medical journals.
If He doesn’t, I don’t question His decision. After all, He is God and He is in control. We are not puppets on a string, but there is a reason for His decisions to intervene or not to intervene. This is evident throughout the Bible. The stoning of Steven, the beheading of John the Baptist, Job’s trials, etc. We may not understand why He is silent at times, so faith comes into play. He is there even when He is silent. Trust that He has the bigger picture in mind regardless of how it affects our little world. I learned this lesson while battling my own cancer, and it is helping me tremendously in this as well.
Regardless of the timing or eventual outcome, we are confident in her eternal destiny. And, we know that one day we will all be together forevermore.